Grief is a journey like no other and is unique to each individual. Losing a loved one can be incredibly traumatic, and you must take time to heal. Returning to work can feel like such an unachievable task, but with the right support, it can help you return to some sort of normality. In this blog post, we are going to offer some practical tips on how to make the transition back to work after losing a loved one.
Grief In The Workplace
With grief, there is no timetable, no way of knowing when it will end and it doesn’t just save itself for when you are home alone on the sofa in the evening. It is an ongoing process that affects people physically, emotionally, and mentally. Workplaces tend to operate on strict schedules which can feel quite daunting when dealing with the unpredictable nature of grief.
It is really important to realise that grief is a personal experience, and some people may find comfort in getting back to their old work routines. That isn’t to say everyone will feel like this, some people may struggle with processing grief while being in a work environment. It is important that the person experiencing the loss feels supported in their place of work.
Planning Your Return
Picking when to return after work is something you should take a lot of time to think about. Some people are best returning quickly, getting back into a routine, and having distractions. Others may feel completely overwhelmed by the thought of going back to work and may need more time to get a handle on their grief.
Here are a few things to keep in mind when considering returning to work after grief:
- Your emotional state: are you stable enough to face the challenges of the workplace? Don’t be in a rush to get back to work, take the time you need to process the grief.
- Financial implications: some people may have to return to work as they can’t afford not to. If this is the case, talk to your employer about passionate leave, reduced hours or even flexible working arrangements to ease you back in.
- Workload and responsibilities: if you have a stressful, busy job then it may be worth asking your employer about easing back into work with reduced hours, just while you get your head around everything.
Chat With Your Employer
Communication is key to helping you transition back into work, and generally, employers are incredibly understanding and will do their best to accommodate your needs. Most employers will have a bereavement policy, but the support does vary with these so it is always best to check. Here are a few starting points for things to discuss with your employer:
- Flexible working hours – ask if you can either have flexible working hours or the option to work from home if that would help you to cope better. If you do this, you must be careful not to isolate yourself too much.
- Phased return – this is where you start with part-time hours, gradually increasing them until you are back to full-time.
- External support – ask about whether there is counseling available to help you navigate this tough period.
It is also worth thinking about how much information you want to share with both your employers and your colleagues. You may prefer to keep things private, or it may be better to have it all in the open to help prevent misunderstandings.
Coping With Grief At Work
Returning to work can bring with it a lot of challenges, and some basic tasks that you used to carry out easily can trigger your grief. You may also find that your concentration and productivity levels are not what they used to be, so cut yourself some slack. Here are a few strategies to help you cope with grief while at work:
- Set boundaries: if you are not ready to talk about your loss, that is perfectly acceptable, just let your colleagues know that so they don’t keep asking you.
- Take regular breaks: grief can leave you feeling all sorts of emotions, which can be exhausting. Give yourself permission to take regular breaks away from your desk to clear your head.
- Look after yourself: self-care is really important when going through grief, and even simple things like taking yourself on a walk during lunchtime can give you that little bit of headspace.
- Ask for support: you don’t have to go through this alone. If your workplace has a support system for employee wellbeing, then reach out and use it.
Embracing The New Normal
Returning to work after grief will make you realise that things probably won’t ever go back to how they were, and that is ok. Grief can change your perspective on lots of things, so be kind to yourself as you navigate this new chapter of your life. As long as you continue to make yourself a priority and reach out when you need help, you can get through this.